How many will you “buy”?

The fall music preview
It’s that time again — the time when nearly every major (and minor) musical artist has a new CD. And when the ailing music biz tries to make up for yet another year of falling profits by stacking the deck.
That means it’s also time for our annual Fall Music Preview, your best (and snarkiest) guide to all the rock rolling your way in the coming months.
Start circling these release dates on your calendar — but do it in pencil, because they can change faster than Mel Gibson’s bar mitzvah plans.
–Audioslave: “Revelations”
A third public service announcement — with guitars! — from Rage Against the Soundgarden. (Sony BMG, Sept. 5)
–Beyonce: “B’Day”
When you’re Beyonce, every day probably feels like your birthday. (Sony BMG, Sept. 5)
–Iron Maiden: “A Matter of Life and Death”
First single: The Reincarnation of Benjamin Breeg. Catchy, no? OK, no. (EMI, Sept. 5)
–Barenaked Ladies: “Barenaked Ladies Are Me”
They cut nearly 30 songs — and will release them all in different versions and media. Somebody needs to try decaf. (Warner, Sept. 12)
–Everclear: “Welcome to the Drama Club”
Welcome to the new Everclear — frontman Art Alexakis is the last man standing. (Universal, Sept. 12)
–Elton John: “The Captain & the Kid”
Reg and lyricist Bernie Taupin recall 1975’s Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy. (Universal, Sept. 12)
–Los Lobos: “The Town and The City”
The East L.A. rockers get their Kiko freak on for this 13th CD. (Universal, Sept. 12)
–The Mars Volta: “Amputechture”
These prog-punks crank out another eight songs in 76 minutes. You do the math. (Universal, Sept. 12)
–John Mayer: “Continuum”
As long as we don’t have to hear Your Body is a Wonderland ever again, we’ll be happy. (Sony BMG, Sept. 12)
–Bob Seger: “Face the Promise”
Talk about a stranger in town — this is the Detroit rocker’s first new CD in 11 years. (EMI, Sept. 12)
–Justin Timberlake: “FutureSex/LoveSounds”
If there’s one thing we don’t want to hear, it’s J.T.’s love sounds. (Sony BMG, Sept. 12)
–Yo La Tengo: “I Am Not Afraid of You, and I Will Beat Your Ass”
No more entries, please. These New Jersey indie-rockers win Album Title of the Year. (Matador, Sept. 12)
–Clay Aiken: “A Thousand Different Ways”
Too bad all of them suck. (Sony BMG, Sept. 19)
–Fergie: “The Duchess”
It can’t possibly be worse than My Humps. Can it? Can it?? (Universal, Sept. 19)
–Diana Krall: “From This Moment On”
Diana does Broadway and film tunes — then waits for the Junos to roll in. (Universal, Sept. 19)
–Sloan: “Never Hear the End of It”
The Canadian pop-rockers keep going, and going, and going. (Koch, Sept. 19)
–Tony Bennett: “Duets/An American Classic”
Elton, Elvis, Sting and more help Tony mark his 80th birthday. (Sony BMG, Sept. 26)
–Emily Haines: “Knives Don’t Have Your Back”
The Metric frontwoman goes solo — with a little help from the Broken Social Scenesters. (Last Gang, Sept. 26)
–Alan Jackson: “Like Red on a Rose”
Alison Krauss produced — but we hear it’s not a bluegrass record. Allrighty, then. (Sony BMG, Sept. 26)
–Janet Jackson: “20 Y.O.”
The Y.O. stands for Years Old. In her magic mirror, perhaps. (EMI, Sept. 26)
–The Lemonheads: “The Lemonheads”
Evan Dando dumps his drug buddy to make his first Lemonheads disc in a decade. (Universal, Sept. 26)
–Sean Lennon: “Friendly Fire”
John and Yoko’s beautiful boy unveils his first full-length in eight years. (EMI, Sept. 26)
–Jerry Lee Lewis: “Last Man Standing”
The Killer’s return features Eric Clapton, Neil Young, Bruce Springsteen, Little Richard and Mick Jagger. Whole lotta shmoozin’ goin’ on. (Artists First, Sept. 26)
–Paul McCartney: “Ecce Cor Meum”
Paul goes classical again. If he’s smart, he got Heather to take the profits in lieu of alimony. (EMI, Sept. 26)
–Scissor Sisters: “Ta-Dah”
Elton John guests. The first single is I Don’t Feel Like Dancin’. What more do you want? (Universal, Sept. 26)
–Paul Westerberg: “Open Season”
The Replacements frontman wrote songs for a kids’ cartoon. No, really. (Universal, Sept. 26)
–Trey Anastasio: “Bar 17”
The Phisherman jams with a couple of his old bandmates on his latest solo trip. (Rubber Jungle, Oct. 3)
–Beck: “The Information”
Mutations and Sea Change producer Nigel Godrich is back; expect something even more unusual than usual. (Universal, Oct. 3)
–Lindsey Buckingham: “Under the Skin”
The Big Macster serves his first solo set since 1992. (Warner, Oct. 3)
–Evanescence: “The Open Door”
The first single is Call Me When You’re Sober. Gee, wonder who that’s about? (Warner, Oct. 3)
–The Hold Steady: “Boys and Girls in America”
These Brooklyn rockers’ last disc was our favourite album of 2005. We expect greatness. (Universal, Oct. 3)
–Jet: “Shine On”
The Aussie rockers serve up a second helping of riff-rock. (Warner, Oct. 3)
–The Killers: “Sam’s Town”
The best-dressed men in dance-rock try to create another hot fuss. (Universal, Oct. 3)
–Robert Pollard: “Normal Happiness”
It’s only the second album this year from the ex-GBV frontman. Slacker. (Merge, Oct. 10)
–Rod Stewart: “Still the Same … Great Rock Classics of Our Time”
Rod covers oldies like Bonnie Tyler’s It’s a Heartache. So now Rod is impersonating a Rod impersonator. (Sony BMG, Oct. 10)
–Sting: “Songs From the Labyrinth”
Hands up, anybody who wants to hear a set of 16th-century music played on the lute. Anybody? (Universal, Oct. 10)
–The Tragically Hip: “World Container”
The Canuck rockers hooked up with superstar producer Bob Rock for their latest effort. (Universal, Oct. 17)
–Diddy: “Press Play”
Hey, isn’t he about due for a new name already? How about Piddy? Cuffy? (Warner, Oct. 17)
–Vince Gill: “These Days”
The Gillster is releasing four CDs of all-new material. Dude needs a hobby. (Universal, Oct. 17)
–Snoop Dogg: “Blue Carpet Treatment”
We have no idea what a blue carpet treatment is — but we bet every white boy is gonna be saying it soon. (Universal, Oct. 17)
–Montgomery Gentry: “Some People Change”
Featuring the single: Ah Kilt a Bahr, Ah Did. (Sony BMG, Oct. 24)
–Paul Stanley: “Live to Win”
KISS’s starchild makes his first solo album in 28 years. Which begs the question: Why? (Universal, Oct. 24)
–The Who: “Endless Wire”
Is there any rock fan alive who doesn’t want to hear new tunes from Pete Townshend and Roger Daltrey? (Universal, Oct. 23)
–Deftones: “Saturday Night Wrist”
A new disc by Chino Moreno’s metal outfit, partially produced by Bob Ezrin, on Halloween? Seems right. (Warner, Oct. 31)
–Barry Manilow: “The Greatest Songs of the Sixties”
Music to break a hip to. (Sony BMG, Oct. 31)
–Meat Loaf: “Bat Out of Hell III: The Monster Is Loose”
And he’s headed for the buffet! Run! (EMI, Oct. 31)
–Megadeth: “United Abominations”
We liked these guys better a few years ago. When they broke up. (Universal, Oct. 31)
–Willie Nelson & Ryan Adams: “Songbird”
Is this a match made in troubadour heaven or what? (Universal, Oct. 31)
–Lucinda Williams: “The Knowing”
Singer-songwriter Lucinda hasn’t let us down yet. Doubt she’s gonna start now. (Universal, Nov. 7)
–Taylor Hicks: TBA
Guess somebody bought a bucket. (Sony BMG, Nov. 14)
–Incubus: “Light Grenades”
First they were punks. They they were alt-rockers. Then they got freaky. Who knows what’s next. (Sony BMG, Nov. 21)
–Tom Waits: “Orphans: Brawlers, Bawlers and Bastards”
The musical mad scientist unleashes a monster: A three-disc set with 54 new songs and a couple dozen rarities. (Anti-, Nov. 21)