From the “Seriously! Seriously! Seriously! Who seriously gives a rat’s ass?!?!?!” file

‘Joe Millionaire’ Sums It Up
Evan and Zora may not have found love on Joe Millionaire, but they did find money.
As fans expected, Evan Marriott picked Zora over Sarah in Monday’s extended finale of Fox’s hit reality show, Joe Millionaire. After he told Zora he had lied to her about having $50 million and she told him she forgave him, and was actually happy that he didn’t have the money, Joe revealed its final, long-promised twist. They were given a $1 million check in both their names, presented on a silver platter by the butler.
That makes them millionaires √≥ if they stay together. Next week in a special detailing the show’s aftermath, viewers find out if they did.
After more than an hour of recap Monday, Evan finally broke the news to Zora, telling her flatly, “I’ve chosen you.” (Her response: “Are you serious?”) He then owned up to the show’s central ruse: “I don’t have $50 million. I don’t have $50,000. I’m sorry I lied to you.” He asked an enigmatically calm Zora to give him her answer later that evening, then went to break the news to Sarah.
Though he said his time with her had been “really neat,” he told Sarah she was not his pick, saying later that he feared she was more into Joe Millionaire than Evan Marriott. She was then reunited with the already rejected Melissa, and they had a laugh at Evan’s expense, with Sarah calling him a “big loser without any money.”
So, did Evan make the right choice? “Definitely,” says Shannon Stewart, 34, of Norcross, Ga. “I have been a Zora fan since Day One.” The pick didn’t surprise her, but the twist with the money did.
Chris Johnson, 28, of Chillicothe, Ohio, had been a Melissa fan, but he switched to Zora. “This was kind of the ending I was hoping for. I wanted Zora, and I was kind of hoping the end would be them getting money themselves.”
The two-hour special was the climax of a surprisingly successful run for Joe, which has averaged 20 million viewers since its Jan. 6 premiere. With much of the Northeast snowbound, Fox was hoping to top last week’s 24 million peak, though the show did face stiffer-than-usual competition from NBC’s two-hour Michael Jackson special and a repeat of ABC’s interview with Jackson.