Hey Dan! What’s new in theatres this weekend?

Ah yes, it’s Friday, and time for our weekly look at what’s new in theatres.

Three films will invade your local multiplex for the very first time over the next few days, but sadly only one of them is worth even an iota of your time! And that one is only barely worth said time. I’ll save the iota worthy entry until last.

Let’s start with All About The Benjamins, the feature film debut from the director of the Savage Garden music video for “I Knew I Loved You.” In the very least that video featured the lovely Kirsten Dunst.

All About The Benjamins doesn’t have Dunst, it has dunces!

Rap star turned actor-producer-cowriter Ice Cube is busy keeping his eyes on the chedda in this cheesy action flick. As a small-time bounty hunter, Cube befriends a two-bit con man, who falls into a murder/diamond heist switcheroo just after winning the lottery and losing the ticket. Yeah, these guys are keeping it real. Real stupid! The term “Benjamins” is slang for dollars, so if your life is all about not wasting your “Benjamins”, avoid this flick and keep them in your pocket.

In Canada, the slang for a dollar is “Loonie”, so in our home and native land this movie would be called “All About The Loonies.”

And “All About The Loonies” could also be the title of a documentary that might someday be made about the people who thought another cinematic version of H.G. Wells’ classic The Time Machine was a good idea. Now I don’t want to say that this new version is bad, although it is really, really bad, so let me just say this, and you can quote me: This new version of The Time Machine is worse than Battlefield Earth. And I am not exaggerating in the slightest.

The director, Simon Wells- who is no less than the great-grandson of H.G. Wells- doesn’t care a whit about respecting his family’s good name. Wells tries to convey an imaginative story, one which would stimulate our brain waves in the year 2002, perhaps to think, “If I had a chance to take a trip in a time machine, would I accept the challenge and, if so, would I go into the past or the future? How many years?” But his efforts are all for naught and at it’s conclusion the film is lacking in both resonance and interest. Seriously, The Time Machine is worse than Battlefield Earth!

Quite frankly, it made me want to watch Back To The Future, a good time travel movie. That great film even featured some Canadian content in the form of Michael J. Fox.

Canadian content, in many forms, is the goal of the other new film being released this weekend, and this is the one that is worth an iota of your time!

Men With Brooms was written, directed, filmed, produced and performed by Canadians, lead by “Due South” staple Paul Gross and the legendary Leslie Neilsen. It’s about love and curling, two sports played and enjoyed by many Canucks. But what could have been a fun film for, by and about folks from The Great White North suffers because it was made for, by and about folks from said North.

But that is why this is my “Worth An Iota Of Your Time” film of the weekend. I am a Canadian, I get the jokes, and I liked the movie. Yes, even though there are many, many, many, many, many things in it that make it a horrible movie, I liked it! It could have been exceptional! But it’s not. It could have been great! But it’s not. It doesn’t usurp Bob & Doug McKenzie’s “Strange Brew” as the best Canadian movie ever made, but I liked it!

Maybe I am just too proud a Canadian to not like it. That said, I warn you that Men With Brooms is not a great film, as I said it is actually very bad in parts, but it is still better than the 2 American films coming out this weekend.

But I doubt that it will be better than the Yankee films coming out next weekend; “Showtime” with Robert DeNiro and Eddie Murphy and the computer animated “Ice Age”, so enjoy this slice of Canadiana while you can.

And go out and get a copy of “Strange Brew” as well. After all these years, it’s still the best Canadian movie ever made!

Enjoy the popcorn and I’ll see you at the movies!