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To Stop Us From Saying, “Haven’t We Seen This Before?”…

…director Peter Jackson vows a fesh take on his “Lord Of The Rings” sequels.

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Mr. Pretty Boy Wants To Be Prettier

Tom Cruise has been fitted for braces.

What?!?!?

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Which One Is More Desperate?

Spike Lee is now directing Kmart TV ads.

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This Sounds Incredible!

Coens, Bill Murray team on twisted ‘Santa’

An off-beat comic dream team — The Coen Brothers, Bill Murray, and “Ghost World” director Tery Zwigoff — is joining forces for the seasonal comedy “Bad Santa,” according to The Hollywood Reporter.

The Coens will produce the project, with Zwigoff directing and Murray starring as a con man who poses as Santa to rob shopping malls over Christmas, complete with an elf sidekick.

Their grifting ways are challenged, though, when they meet an eight-year-old who reminds them what Christmas is all about, The Hollywood Reporter said.

The project was written by John Requa and Glenn Ficarra (“Cats & Dogs”). When Working Title films put the film into turnaround, Dimension Pictures snatched it up, got the Coens to do a rewrite, and signed on Zwigoff, the report said.

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He Was The King!

‘SNL’ compiling Belushi anniversary special

The 20th anniversary of the passing of comedian John Belushi won’t pass unnoticed by his fellow comedians.

Fox News reports the anniversary, which is on March 5, will be noted with a “Saturday Night Live” special, pulling together memorable bits from throughout Belushi’s career, plus tributes from friends and castmates.

The special will be hosted by current “Weekend Update” anchors Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey. Fox News said the special probably would not air until March 16.

Belushi died of a heroin/cocaine overdose in 1982 at Hollywood’s Chateau Marmont.

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Something Else I’ll Need To Buy

Rare XTC tracks surface on box set

The up-and-down career of Britain’s XTC will be celebrated with a four-disc box set due for release in March.

The set, dubbed “A Coat Of Many Cupboards,” was compiled with the participation of XTC’s Andy Partridge and Colin Moulding and features 60 tracks spanning the group’s time with Virgin (the group has since left the label), EMI/Virgin announced.

The set will include a booklet with Partridge and Moulding commenting on each track, plus an essay by XTC expert Harrison Sherwood. Key for longstanding XTC fans is a handful of demos and rare recordings.

Disc one, which covers the years 1977 to 1979, includes a demo of “Science Fiction”,recorded for CBS records, before the group had signed to Virgin; a live version of “Spinning Top”; a Mutt Lange produced version of “This Is Pop”; a discarded recording of “Life Begins At The Hop”; a demo of “Making Plans For Nigel”; and the outtake “Sleepyheads.”

Disc two covers 1979 through 1981 and includes a live version of “Meccanik Dancing”; an alternate take of “Reel By Real”; a rehearsal of “Generals And Majors”; a recording of Partridge as he writes “Senses Working Overtime”; and a version of “Ball And Chain” produced by Clive Langer and Alan Winstanley.

Disc three covers the period from 1981 to 1986 and includes a Langer/Winstanley production of “Punch And Judy”; the song “Fly On The Wall”; an Old Grey Whistle Test performance of “Yacht Dance”; the demo for “Grass”; and Dave Gregory’s home demo for “Dear God.”

Disc four runs from 1987 to 1992 and includes the B-side “Terrorism”; a writing-session tape for “Mayor Of Simpleton”; the demo for “The Ballad Of Peter Pumpkin Head”; and a BBC recording of “Books Are Burning.”

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So, Dan, should I even go to the movies this weekend?

Well, I say that any experience in a movie theatre is always great, even if the movie is a bad as the two films opening this weekend.

So go for the experience, and the popcorn, and who knows, if you go in with very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very low expectations, you may actually enjoy this weekend’s offerings.

Well, okay I’m lying. You won’t enjoy them, not at all, but popcorn! Who doesn’t love popcorn!

Opening this weekend are two real stiffs of a film, and I don’t mean that as an insensitive reference or a bad pun. They are truly stiffs!

In Dragonfly Kevin Costner stars as a…well, Kevin Costner stars in it, so do I really need to say anything else? Man is this film horrible!

But bad doesn’t begin to describe the mess that is The Queen Of The Damned. This movie is so bad that it wasn’t ever going to see the light of day. Then, one of it’s stars, the lovely and talented Aaliyah, passed away, and the studio “surprisingly” decided that it was going to release the movie.

If you see it, you’ll wish they had stuck with their original decision. This movie sucks, and I don’t mean that just because it is about vampires!

Aaliyah must be spinning in her grave!

Good news though! The January and February stinkers will soon be over as March will be soon upon us!!!!

Coming out in the next few weeks are the films: 40 Days and 40 Nights (Well this one will stink, but then there’s), We Were Soldiers (Mel Gibson stars in this movie from the writer of “Braveheart”), The Time Machine (Starring Guy Pierce), Ice Age, Resident Evil, Showtime and Blade 2.

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Go Canada, go!!!

Canada. Belarus. Today!

It all starts at 2 pm Eastern Time. Canada takes on Belarus in the Olympic Men’s Hockey Tournament with the winner going to the Gold Medal Game and the loser playing for Bronze on Sunday.

I hate to sound like an over- played and stupid soft drink commercial, but if we all cheer for our guys, they will hear us in Salt Lake!

Go Canada, go!!!!!

And I will be home watching the game if you want to give me a call!

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It’s great! Enjoy it, starting Tuesday!

I’ve been telling you for weeks that the new Alanis Morissette CD “Under Rug Swept,” due out Tuesday, February 26th, 2002, was great! Now, here’s another review. (By the way, that reviewer says it’s great too!)

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Still no “Sex” for Britney

HBO Says Britney Spears Won’t Be On “Sex In The City”

HBO is denying a New York Post report that said Spears will guest on the show.

The Post had reported Monday that she’d play Samantha’s niece who seduces her boyfriend. Samantha is played by Kim Cattrall, who play’s Spears’ mom in the movie “Crossroads.”

“Crossroads” debuted at No. 2 with $17 million in the box office. “John Q.” took first place with $23.6 million.