The Couch Potato Report - November 23rd, 2004
In The Couch Potato Report this week there are two cultural icons and two Oscar winners.
SEINFELD is a television show that ran from 1990 until 1998. Actually, when it first aired it was called THE SEINFELD CHRONICLES, but more on that in a moment.
Stand up comedian Jerry Seinfeld stars in the show as a stand up comedian.
The premise of this show is Jerry and his friends going through everyday life, discussing various quirky situations and things that everyone can relate to.
Shirts, water, bosses, shrinkage, being the master of your domain, parking, babies, puffy shirts, soup. No topic or issue was too mundane or off limits.
I still have the videotape that includes the very first episode of SEINFELD, or THE SEINFELD CHRONICLES as it was called that first night, July 5, 1989.
Kramer was called Kessler and there was no Elaine, but from the minute the credits rolled I was an immediate fan of the show.
I, and many, many people remain a fan of SEINFELD to this day.
And now, finally, SEINFELD - SEASONS 1, 2 & 3 are available on two separate 4
disc box sets or in one big box set that features all 41 episodes from
the first three seasons of the show, plus an Original Script, Salt &
Pepper Shakers, and Playing Cards.
Earlier this year, twice earlier this year actually, I proclaimed that the SCTV BOX SETS were the comedy releases of the year!!!
The SEINFELD box sets came a very close second.
On these incredible releases we get to relive Kramer's first not-so-grand entrance, Jerry's first contemptuous "Hello, Newman," and Elaine's first "Get Out!" shove.
We also get "The Pony Remark", "The Chinese Restaurant", "The Boyfriend," with Keith Hernandez and the J.F.K. parody, "The Library."
And lets not forget "The Pez Dispenser" and "The Keys," with an L.A.-bound Kramer winding up on Murphy Brown.
In addition to the original, full-length episodes the sets also come with an incredible array of extras.
There are interviews with the cast and creators about what was happening behind the scenes as the episodes were created and filmed; deleted scenes, out-takes and bloopers; an hour-long look at how Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David first came up with the idea for the show, and much, much more.
In it's heyday SEINFELD was called "a show about nothing." On this day I agree. It was a show about nothing, but it was nothing but entertaining!
I am more than pleased to finally own SEINFELD - SEASONS 1, 2 & 3 on DVD, and other than the two SCTV BOX SETS, SEINFELD is the comedy release of the year!!!
Yadda, yadda, yadda.
I suspect that anyone who likes SEINFELD is feeling a certain kinship with me right now.
Soon, those who love Harry Potter will feel a certain disdain with me, because I just don't get the whole Harry Potter phenomenon.
And I could very well be alone in that because there have been over a quarter of a billion Harry Potter books sold in over 200 countries in 61 different languages.
The Harry Potter films have been just as successful with the three that have been released so far earning a combined 2.6 billion dollars world wide.
Yes, I've read the books, and I've seen the movies. No, I still don't get the whole Harry Potter phenomenon.
But that's okay, as long as it is bringing joy and pleasure to others, it doesn't have to please me as well. After all, not everyone likes SCTV and SEINFELD either.
This week's new Harry Potter title is HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN and the now 13-year-old students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry must face a new challenge, one named Sirius Black.
If you love Harry Potter and his adventures, you already know the rest of the story and plot and you've already bought or rented HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN.
If you are indifferent to the series, you don't need me to say anymore.
I do feel compelled to admit that even though I don't get the whole Harry Potter phenomenon, I still thought the first two films in the series were entertaining.
I found HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN quite boring. Yes, the filmmaking, cast and special effects were superb, but the pace of the film is just so slow that I was twitching in my seat more than a few times during the movie's two hours and twenty one minute running time.
But then again, not everyone likes SCTV and SEINFELD either.
If you are a fan of Harry Potter, and you get get the whole Harry Potter phenomenon, then for you, HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN is a must own.
If you don't come over here with the rest of us muggles and you can read JONATHAN STRANGE & MR. NORRELL with us.
Now that is a book and phenomenon I do get and Susanna Clarke's book JONATHAN STRANGE & MR. NORRELL is a great read if you have a long plane ride ahead of you.
Actually, at 782 pages it is a great book to have with you if your flight gets delayed or cancelled and you get stuck in an airport terminal.
And as clever it may be or not, this week's final new release in The Couch Potato Report is a movie called THE TERMINAL.
Tom Hanks from FORREST GUMP and CATCH ME IF YOU CAN stars as an Eastern European who arrives at New York's Kennedy Airport just as his fictional homeland has fallen to a coup, forcing him, with no valid citizenship, to take indefinite residence in the airport's expansive International Arrivals Terminal.
Along the way Hanks character becomes friends with the terminal's staff and falls for a flight attendant.
Catherine Zeta-Jones from CHICAGO is the flight attendant and the film was directed by Steven Spielberg.
With the talent behind THE TERMINAL, I expected it to be a modern day classic. Sadly, even though the film does have an understated grace, THE TERMINAL never really takes off.
Especially once the film's secrets are revealed. Even then, the movie just doesn't get going.
At the end of THE TERMINAL, I actually felt as if I had just been stuck in an actual airport terminal as I was cranky, tired of sitting around, and I just wanted to get to my destination.
If you are in the mood for a romantic film with great aspirations, that never quite reaches them, then check out THE TERMINAL.
It is available at your favourite local video store alongside SEINFELD - SEASONS 1, 2 & 3 and HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN.
COMING UP IN THE NEXT COUCH POTATO REPORT
Peter Parker faces a new foe and personal struggles as Spider-Man in
the wildly entertaining sequel SPIDER-MAN 2.
And in the superb martial arts film HERO a nameless warrior does battle
with a ruthless emperor.
I'm Dan Reynish and I'll have more on those, and some other releases,
in seven days.
For now, that's this week's COUCH POTATO REPORT.
Enjoy the movies and I'll see you back here next week on The Couch!
New Tunage
Here are reviews for the major music releases for the week of November 23, 2004:
U2 - How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb (Interscope)
Halfway through the excellent new U2 album, Bono announces, "I like the sound of my own voice." Well-said, lad; well-said. Ever since U2 started making noise in Dublin several hundred bloody Sundays ago, Bono has grooved to the sound of his own gargantuan rockness. Ego, shmego - this is one rock-star madman who should never scale down his epic ambitions. As the old Zen proverb goes, you will find no reasonable men on the tops of great mountains, and U2's brilliance is their refusal to be reasonable. U2 were a drag in the 1990s, when they were trying to be cool, ironic hipsters. Feh! Nobody wants a skinny Santa, and for damn sure nobody wants a hipster Bono. We want him over the top, playing with unforgettable fire. We want him to sing in Latin or feed the world or play Jesus to the lepers in his head. We want him to be Bono. Nobody else is even remotely qualified.
U2 bring that old-school, wide-awake fervor to How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb. The last time we heard from them, All That You Can't Leave Behind, U2 were auditioning for the job of the World's Biggest Rock & Roll Band. They trimmed the Euro-techno pomp, sped up the tempos and let the Edge define the songs with his revitalized guitar. Well, they got the job. On Atomic Bomb, they're not auditioning anymore. This is grandiose music from grandiose men, sweatlessly confident in the execution of their duties. Hardly any of the eleven songs break the five-minute mark or stray from the punchy formula of All That You Can't Leave Behind. They've gotten over their midcareer anxiety about whether they're cool enough. Now, they just hand it to the Edge and let it rip.
During the course of Atomic Bomb, you will be urged to ponder death ("Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own"), birth ("Original of the Species"), God ("Yahweh"), love ("A Man and a Woman"), war ("Love and Peace or Else") and peace ("City of Blinding Lights"), which barely gives you time to ponder whether the bassist has been listening to Interpol. "Vertigo" sets the pace, a thirty-second ad jingle blown up to three great minutes, with a riff nicked from Sonic Youth's "Dirty Boots." "City of Blinding Lights" begins with a long Edge guitar intro, building into a bittersweet lament. "Yahweh" continues a U2 tradition, the album-closing chitchat with the Lord. It's too long and too slow, but that's part of the tradition.
Like all U2 albums, Atomic Bomb has false steps, experimental bathroom breaks and moments when the lofty ambitions crash into the nearest wall. As America staggers punch-drunk into another four-year moment we can't get out of, it would be a real pleasure if the political tunes had any depth. (How long? How long must we sing this song?) But Bono scores a direct hit on "One Step Closer," an intimate ballad about his father's death from cancer in 2001; "Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own" is the song U2 did at the funeral. When Bono sings, "You're the reason why I have the operas in me," his grief and his grandiosity seem to come from the same place in his heart. It's a reminder that what makes U2 so big isn't really their clever ideas, or even their intelligence - it's the warmth that all too few rock stars have any idea how to turn into music. (ROB SHEFFIELD)
Gwen Stefani Love, Angel, Music, Baby (Interscope)
No Doubt singer flies solo and hits the dance floor for her first solo album, Gwen Stefani could have gone the solemn schlock route. But fortunately, she obeys her disco instincts on Love, Angel, Music, Baby. It's an irresistible party: trashy, hedonistic and deeply weird. Stefani's gum-snapping sass brings out the beast in her beatmasters, especially the Neptunes in "Hollaback Girl" and Andre 3000 in "Bubble Pop Electric." Dr. Dre and Eve appear in the Fiddler on the Roof goof "Rich Girl." She sings repeatedly about her obsession with "Harajaku Girls," until she sounds like a Japanese pop princess in Valley Girl drag. And anyone who can get New Order on the same track as Wendy and Lisa ("Real Thing") is some kind of visionary. (ROB SHEFFIELD)
Nirvana With the Lights Out (Geffen)
Excessive? Definitely. But so was everything else about Nirvana. They tried too hard, screamed too loud, made a mess out of all they touched. Kurt Cobain jammed his tunes with more emotional intensity than they could hold, blowing his cool at a time when the rock world was into playing it safe. His band rocked so exuberantly, it made other bands sound halfway committed. They pushed it too far. They checked out too fast. Excess, both the heroic and the stupid kinds, was Nirvana's whole story. And they made it sound like sick fun.
With the Lights Out is total excess: three discs of outtakes, B sides, acoustic demos and boombox rehearsal tapes, plus a DVD of raw early footage. Loads of these songs haven't even been rumored on the hardcore Nirvana-bootleg circuit. For starters, there's Cobain's 1989 home recordings, with a scary version of Leadbelly's "They Hung Him on a Cross." From Nirvana's first show, in March 1987, there's an awesomely inept blast at Led Zep's "Heartbreaker." There's an early demo of "Sliver," sad enough to slice up your heart, with the scared little kid in the song singing, "Grandma, take me home" through Cobain's barely adult voice.?
But the prizes are the full-fledged Nirvana songs that got away: "Verse Chorus Verse," "Old Age," "Anorexorcist," "I Hate Myself and I Want to Die," the B side "Curmudgeon," the hilarious stoner goof "Moist Vagina." "Do Re Mi" is an acoustic lament Cobain taped in his bedroom just weeks before his death. The long-bootlegged "Blandest" is one of Nirvana's toughest songs ever - Cobain yowls about a girl he likes ("You're my favorite/Of my saviors") over frantic electric fuzz. Every time he takes it to the bridge, he signals the band with that beaten-dog yelp - "Hey!"- that defines his voice the way "Good God!" defines James Brown. Everything Cobain was trying to articulate about toxic love is right there in that "hey!" Who besides Nirvana could have blown off a song this great?
The DVD footage is nuts - check the 1988 jam at Krist Novoselic's mom's house, with Cobain screaming "The Immigrant Song" at the wall as a friend tries to create a strobe effect by flicking a light switch on and off. But you can't top the naked demo of "Heart Shaped Box," which has doomier lyrics ("I wish I could catch your cancer/When I am bad") and a bent noise-guitar solo. Like all boxes, heart-shaped and otherwise, With the Lights Out is for true-blue fans only. But if you think you want it, you do. More, please. (ROB SHEFFIELD)
By the way, these discs are also coming out today:
CREED Greatest Hits (Wind-Up/Sony)
IRON MAIDEN The Early Days (DVD) (EMI)
JESSICA SIMPSON ReJoyce The Christmas Album (Columbia)
The Year's Best DVDs
Rolling Stone Magazine's Peter Travers picks the top 25 of 2004.
Check out my list of this year's best DVDs. Then we can argue. It's part of the fun. Are the best DVDs all about the quality of the movie itself? Or is it more about the wow factor in image and sound that lets your home-theater system rock the house? Or is it those rare bonus features that go beyond hype to actually reveal something about how movies are made? You hardly ever get all three in one package, but here are the twenty-five DVDs that come the closest.
1. Star Wars Trilogy
George Lucas' sci-fi trilogy (1977's Star Wars, 1980's The Empire Strikes Back and 1983's Return of the Jedi) arrived on DVD at last, with an incredibly crisp picture and a spectacular sound mix to become the DVD event of the year. One caveat: Lucas tweaked each movie, spruced up the special effects, modified lines of dialogue to better fit with his prequels and even replaced actor Sebastian Shaw with prequel star Hayden Christensen to portray the ghost of Anakin (Darth Vader) Skywalker at the end of Jedi. Heresy or artistry? You decide.
Extras: A fourth disc has more than three hours of documentaries, plus photos. Lucas explains how hyperspace works, what Darth Vader really wants from Luke and why the bad guys are dressed in black and white.
Killer Scene: The forest chase in Return of the Jedi is one of the greatest-ever DVD demo sequences. Trees whiz by, speeder bikes explode and you hold your breath and duck.
2. Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
The extended edition (accept no substitutes) adds fifty minutes to the Oscar-winning third part of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. But it's the movie itself, presented here with state-of-the-art attention to sound and image, that bowls you over. And so what if the ending goes on forever? Peter Jackson makes screen history.
Extras: The bonus features are so copious they'd take you nearly a day to watch. Among the deleted scenes, the big thrill is watching Gandalf (Ian McKellen) face off with Saruman (Christopher Lee). Why was it ever cut?
Killer Scene: The battle of Minas Tirith is one for the DVD time capsule. But when Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen) leads the final attack with a cry -- "For Frodo!" -- he becomes the king we've all been waiting for and charges the movie right at the heart.
3. Shrek 2
This computer-animated sequel, the top box-office hit of 2004 to date, comes to DVD brimming with perverse pleasures that show no respect for the rules of kiddie-cartoon form, which is all to the good. Not only is Shrek 2 double the fun of the original, it's more technically assured -- a fact intensified by repeated DVD viewings. And the voices, led by Mike Myers as the ogre hero, are all on the comedy money. But new character Puss in Boots, voiced by Antonio Banderas as a feline Zorro, steals the show.
Extras:The Tech of Shrek 2 is a deep-dish look at the film's innovations in animation. And a parody of American Idol, in which the cast mixes it up with a cartoon Simon Cowell, is a hoot.
Killer Scene: Anything with Puss in Boots -- he's pure catnip.
4. Fahrenheit 9/11
5. Super Size Me
It's not pushing it to call 2004 the Year of the Partisan Documentary. Muckraking is back in style, and, boy, do we need it now. These done-on-the-run provocations don't have Lord of the Rings production values, but they're alive with passion. Here are two of the finest:
Fahrenheit 9/11 Michael Moore's emotionally rich and ferociously funny film is more than Dubya drubbing; it's a shocking look at the human toll that U.S. foreign policy -- since 9/11 and the war in Iraq -- is taking on the disenfranchised.
Extras: More than an hour of deleted scenes. Pay special attention to footage of a storm-trooper-like roundup of suspected insurgents in an Iraqi suburb.
Killer Scene: Moore's interview with Lila Lipscomb, the mother of a son killed in Iraq, puts a human face on a global tragedy.
Super Size Me Morgan Spurlock's indisputably hilarious experiment -- to consume Big Macs, fries and sugary soft drinks for thirty days -- is a subversive indictment of fast-food propaganda and the willingness of adults and kids to swallow it.
Extras: An interview with Eric Schlosser, author of Fast Food Nation, stings smartly and cuts deep.
Killer Scene: Spurlock administering a test to schoolchildren, who can't identity Jesus or American presidents but know instantly who Ronald McDonald is.
6. The Passion of the Christ
Drenched in gore, Mel Gibson's violent depiction of Christ's final hours is unrelentingly intense and, for many, also spiritually cathartic. With an exquisite picture transfer and a vivid soundtrack, the DVD accentuates the film's most powerful moments.
Extras: There aren't any. Maybe Gibson thought having us read subtitles while the actors speak Aramaic and Latin was enough.
Killer Scene: Ironically, a glimpse of Jesus (Jim Caviezel) quietly praying in the garden of Gethsemane is the most stirring image of him as human and as divine.
7. Spider-Man 2
A real looker among the year's DVDs, this sequel keeps springing surprises as Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) reveals his secret Spider-Man identity to Mary Jane (Kirsten Dunst). The movie's distinction is its heart, but you can't blame the fan boys for preferring the action. There's plenty, and director Sam Raimi dishes it out with a surer hand than he did in the first film. From the opening scene of Peter delivering pizza to Spidey foiling a bank robbery, the effects are top-notch and gorgeously rendered on DVD.
Extras: There are two discs stuffed with commentaries, behind-the-scenes peeks and blooper reels. Best is the "Ock-umentary" on Doc Ock (Alfred Molina), the tentacled villain.
Killer Scene: The fight between Spidey and Doc Ock on a runaway train has all the bells and whistles. It's a kick just to watch the doc's smart arms as they move like sinuous belly dancers and seduce the doc to the dark side.
8. Kill Bill
Each of the two Kill Bill volumes -- both released this year -- pulsates with action. But put them together, which director-writer Quentin Tarantino promises to do at a later date, and get ready to be knocked for a loop. In Vol. 1, the Bride (a never-better Uma Thurman) sets up her revenge on Bill (a superb David Carradine) and his squad of assassins. In Vol. 2, she completes her mission of death.
Extras: Not that much to speak of, just clips from a premiere, promotional puffery and Tarantino talking about his B-movie inspirations. Perhaps QT is waiting for the ultimate Kill Bill collection to unspring the real goodies. There is one great deleted scene -- a miniature masterpiece -- on Vol. 2: a fully executed kung-fu duel featuring Carradine and five attackers.
Killer Scene: In Vol. 1, it's the opening battle in a suburban home, as Thurman and Vivica A. Fox trash the living room but stop and pretend to be friends when Fox's young daughter comes home from school. You hear every broken shard of glass hit the floor, and you hear Thurman and Fox breathing, no matter how loud the crashing becomes.
In Vol. 2, it's the fight in the trailer between Thurman and Daryl Hannah. Watch out for the snake and the sound you hear when Thurman squishes Hannah's eye between her long, lethal toes.
9. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
The best of the three Potter films to date -- thanks to the dark magic of director Alfonso Cuaron -- is also the best DVD. The first two films were slogs due to the candy-bright view of director Chris Columbus. Cuaron works in the shadows, where mystery, sex and trauma do their mischief. The crisp transfer catches what goes bump in the night.
Extras: There are interactive challenges for the kids. But the interview with author J.K. Rowling is the no-bull surprise.
Killer Scene: It won't be just kids who get nightmares from the attack of the killer tree. And poor Harry (Daniel Radcliffe), who thinks a prisoner (Gary Oldman) is the key to his parents' murder, is in for a shock from soul-sucking creatures called Dementors.
Most Comprehensive DVD Package
10. The Matrix Trilogy
The metaphorical and innovative 1999 action film and its two disappointing but challenging sequels (The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions, both released in 2003) make for a mind-bending ten-disc DVD experience. Watching Keanu Reeves as Neo negotiate his love for Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss) and his loyalty to Morpheus (Laurence Fishburne) for three movies, you might think you're living in someone else's reality, which may be just what visionary filmmakers Larry and Andy Wachowski want you to think.
Extras: Each film comes with two commentary tracks, one by a pair of philosophers who admire the films, and one by a trio of movie critics who don't. The made-for-DVD anthology, The Animatrix, which explains the trilogy's back story, is included, as are two potent supplements: One examines the trilogy's underpinnings in Western and Eastern philosophy, and one asks whether we are all wired to a virtual world.
Killer Scene: The docking-bay battle in the final film is spectacular, but the most thrilling blend of action and character involves Neo and Trinity in the first Matrix, running up a wall to dodge bullets and rescue Morpheus from a fate worse than bad dreams: machines.
11. The Day After Tomorrow
As drama, this end-of-the-world fable is dribbling drool. It's the weather-on-acid special effects that give your audiovisual system a wild ride as a $125 million budget and an army of computers show the horrors of global warming: A tidal wave drowns Manhattan. Multiple tornadoes destroy Los Angeles. Hailstorms pound Tokyo. Hurricanes whack Hawaii. The only thing scarier is the monumental ineptitude of the acting, writing and directing.
Extras: Forget the commentary tracks. The best extra? A chance to break apart the seven different audio components that make up the soundtrack for the helicopter-crash sequence.
Killer Scene: A Russian freighter floating down Fifth Avenue has a haunting stillness.
12. The Bourne Supremacy
Globe-trotting spy thrillers rarely come as satisfying as this sequel to 2002's Bourne Identity. Starting with a knockout performance from Matt Damon as an amnesiac CIA assassin, the film delivers whiplash action without compromising its realistic atmosphere and emotional precision.
Extras: There are about forty-five minutes of documentaries, the best of which reveals the secrets of the car chase.
Killer Scene: The most innovative movie car chase in the last three decades. Jack up the sound and it will bring to life every nightmare auto accident you've ever been in or witnessed.
13. The Battle of Algiers
Gillo Pontecorvo's systematic rendering of a terrorist revolt against the colonial French government in Algeria is as relevant and gripping as it was in 1965.
Extras: Two additional discs are loaded with bonus material. The most vital extra features two former intelligence officers, Richard A. Clarke and Michael A. Sheehan, talking about the parallels between the film and the latest war on terrorism, and how history is repeating itself.
Killer Scene: In a crowded cafe, a terrorist leaves a bomb that explodes on cue. The film is so documentarylike that you can't believe it's only movie stunt people being buried in the rubble.
14. Dawn of the Dead
Director Zach Snyder's remake of George Romero's 1978 zombie classic is a gore freak's delight and much better than we had any right to expect. And it's the unrated director's cut you want to get your hands on, not the wimp version that played multiplexes.
Extras: More than twelve minutes of pukeworthy deleted scenes. But the special feature on how to explode a head is alone worth the DVD price.
Killer Scene: They're all killer scenes, baby. Chow down.
15. Garden State
Scrubs star Zach Braff debuts as a screenwriter and director in a hilarious and heartfelt love story, bolstered by his sweet chemistry with co-star Natalie Portman.
Extras: The actor comments are tart and funny. Portman praises Braff for not being the kind of male who would write her role as "hot, naked a lot and crazy about sports."
Killer Scene: Braff in a shirt that matches his bathroom wallpaper. Watch. You'll see.
16. Hellboy: Director's Cut
Guillermo del Toro's faithful, enthusiastic rendering of Mike Mignola's comic-book tale about a big red demon (Ron Perlman) who works for the U.S. government is best seen in this recut version, which adds thirteen minutes of material, including one action scene and a lot of eccentric character development.
Extras: Two additional discs hold three hours of documentaries and behind-the-scenes footage. The most rewarding segment is hearing Del Toro talk about his love for comics since childhood.
Killer Scene: In Dolby 5.1 sound, the all-stops-out fight in the subway seems to come crashing down on top of you.
17. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Jim Carrey races through a dreamscape to hold on to his memories of Kate Winslet (in peak form), memories that Mark Ruffalo and Kirsten Dunst zap electronically.
Extras: Deleted scenes reveal a compelling but excised subplot; what stands out is a fifteen-minute segment on Carrey, who gives his most effective dramatic performance to date. Carrey talks reflectively and cogently on the gravity of his role, and yet there he is between takes keeping the cast and crew in stitches.
Killer Scene: A car falls from nowhere, and store signs begin to get fuzzy the first time you realize that not all of the film is taking place in the real world. This scene and many like it are tributes to the visual wizardry of director Michel Gondry.
18. Mean Girls
Tina Fey wrote and co-stars in this witty take on fem rivalries in high school. And Lindsay Lohan scores as the the innocent who gradually turns bitchy-mean.
Extras: Fey offers delicious commentary, and there are very funny bloopers, but the best segment is Rosalind Wiseman, author of the novel on which the film is based, talking about social pressures on teen girls.
Killer Scene: When Fey, in the role of a teacher, tells the girls, "Stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it all right for guys to call you sluts and whores."
19. John Cassavetes: Five Films
Essential movies from the pioneer of American indies, starting with his first film, 1959's Shadows, and including his 1974 landmark, A Woman Under the Influence, in which his wife (the sublime Gena Rowlands) gives the performance of her career.
Extras: Each movie is accompanied by retrospective interviews with cast and crew members. And a three-hour documentary about Cassavetes appears on a separate disc. Significantly, the original cut of The Killing of a Chinese Bookie makes its first appearance since its 1976 debut.
Killer Scene: In Faces, Seymour Cassel really jams his fingers down Lynn Carlin's throat after her character nearly ODs on pills. It's the sort of raw, gripping filmmaking that comes from a more daring age.
20. I, Robot
This sci-fi thriller is constructed around a murder mystery that keeps Will Smith hurtling forward and us caring what happens next. Grand special effects heighten the rousing fights and chases.
Extras: On the commentary track, director Alex Proyas and screenwriter Akiva Goldsman skillfully deconstruct the detective genre.
Killer Scene: Driving a hot-looking car of the future, Smith is trapped in a tunnel between two trucks that suddenly spill open from the sides to let robots leap out and crawl over his car like giant insects.
21. Collateral
This head-spinning ride through one hellish Los Angeles night gave Tom Cruise, as a hit man, and Jamie Foxx, as the cabbie he forces to drive him on a murder spree, a chance to break type and fire up the screen. That they do. But the movie belongs to director Michael Mann, who orchestrates action and mood with a poet's eye for urban darkness.
Extras: A superb making-of documentary shows how Mann risked shooting eighty percent of the film on high-definition digital video to penetrate the murky night. It's a risk that paid off with groundbreaking results.
Killer Scene: Three coyotes cross in front of the cab in mockery of the city's thin hold on civilization. It's Mann's peek into hell.
22. Napoleon Dynamite
Here's the little comedy that came out of nowhere to gross $40 million and build an avid cult of repeat viewers. Newcomer Jon Heder is geek perfection as the white boy in a tight red Afro who helps his Mexican friend Pedro (the hilariously deadpan Efren Ramirez) run for class president.
Extras: Since to watch this bizarro movie is to need to know where it came from, you'll enjoy the commentary from Heder and first-time director Jared Hess, who wrote the script with his wife, Jerusha. The sweetest extra is the five-minute "Wedding of the Century" epilogue that Hess added to the movie when it went into wide release.
Killer Scene: It has to be Napoleon's dance near the end when he amazes his high school with his slick moves. Where did the nerd find rhythm? The same place where Hess picked up the the talent to make silly soar.
23. School of Rock
Jack Black, in a star-making comic turn, plays Dewey Finn, a phony substitute teacher who enlightens a group of fifth-graders on the art of rock & roll. Combo Black with a deft script from Mike White (The Good Girl) and pitch-perfect direction from Richard Linklater (Dazed and Confused), and you have a movie that hits all the right notes. "I serve society by rocking," Dewey tells his class. Who's going to argue with that?
Extras: Black is on one commentary track, and the kids are on another. It makes for chaotic fun. There is a clip of Black begging Led Zeppelin to let their songs be used in the film. He also cuts loose in a lengthy Comedy Central piece. In the funniest instructional segment (stupidly relegated to DVD-ROM), Black names his favorite bands and offers his very personal interpretation of the history of rock & roll.
Killer Scene: Black shows the kids how to turn anger, about anything, into a decent rock song.
24. Hero
"Breathtaking" does not begin to describe the action in this Oscar-nominated film from director Zhang Yimou. Martial-arts legend Jet Li stars as the nameless hero who claims to have killed three assassins to protect Qin, a conqueror out to unite the warring states of China in the third century B.C.
Extras: The storyboards fascinate, but so does a conversation between Jet Li and Quentin Tarantino on what makes a hero.
Killer Scenes: For poetry, it's the fight set against falling leaves. For spectacle, it's the spray of arrows that fall like a hailstorm. For every scene, it's the talent of cinematographer Christopher Doyle (In the Mood for Love) that makes this movie look lit from within.
25. DodgeBall
For sheer stupid, raunchy fun, you can't beat this parody of sadistic sports movies. DodgeBall pits Vince Vaughn and his Average Joes against Ben Stiller and his Purple Cobras. No crotch joke is missed. The surprise? Most of them are funny.
Extras: Bloopers, deleted scenes and an alternate ending can't compete with the hilarious segment on dodgeball training.
Killer Scene: Rip Torn, as coach Patches O'Houlihan, throws wrenches at players' heads to toughen them up for the game.
'The Contest' Picked As Favorite 'Seinfeld' Moment
If only one episode of NBC's "Seinfeld" could reign as the master of its domain and as the king of its castle, it's no surprise that viewers would pick "The Contest." The episode, from the popular comedy's fourth season, topped an AOL member poll of favorite "Seinfeld" moments.
Launched in anticipation of the DVD release of the show's first three seasons, the AOL poll provided user with 25 possible classic moments from the classic comedy, which went off the air in 1998. That list of 25 was narrowed down to five possible moments and after more than 550,00 votes, "The Contest" came out the rather predictable winner.
"Seinfeld had so many wonderfully imaginative episodes and segments, so it's fascinating to see which were the favorites among AOL members," Lexine Wong, executive vice president of marketing for Columbia TriStar Home Entertainment, which is releasing the DVD.
Perhaps no "Seinfeld" episode produced as much water cooler discussion at "The Contest," which premiered on Nov. 18, 1992. In the half-hour, Jerry (Jerry Seinfeld) and George (Jason Alexander) begin a contest of self-denial and the rest of the gang jumps in on the action. Larry David won an Emmy for writing the euphemism-heavy episode, in which the word "masturbation" is never mentioned. Tom Cherones, who directed the episode, was also nominated for an Emmy and the series picked up the trophy for outstanding comedy that year.
The other top moments were less episodes so much as moments or catch phrases. George's explanation of "shrinkage" received the second most votes, followed by George's famous encounter with the Soup Nazi. Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) dancing finished fourth beating out the immortal and wildly overused catch phrase "Yada, yada, yada."
The "Seinfeld" DVD hits shelves today (Tuesday, November 23), while NBC will air a retrospective with the major cast members two nights later on Thursday.
NO GRAY WIG REQUIRED THIS TIME AROUND
Mrs. Doubtfire isn't finished yet. Eleven years after the Robin Williams drag comedy appeared on the big screen, a sequel to the hit film is in the works at Fox 2000. Williams is in early talks to reprise his role as Mrs. Doubtfire and resume producing duties with Marsha Williams. Bonnie Hunt also is in talks to pen the project. In the original, directed by Chris Columbus, Williams played an estranged father who poses as a Scottish nanny, Euphegenia Doubtfire, in order to get access to his children and successfully bypass his ex-wife (Sally Field).
The film grossed $219 million domestically. The film garnered two Golden Globes in 1994, one for best picture (comedy/musical) and one for Williams as best actor in a comedy/musical. The film also won an Oscar for best makeup for Williams' elaborate transformation into a frumpy, bespectacled older woman. Williams' recent credits include David Duchovny's "House of D" and Christopher Nolan's "Insomnia." The Oscar-winning actor has just been announced to receive the Cecil B. DeMille Award from the Hollywood Foreign Press Assn. at the 62nd annual Golden Globes on Jan. 16.
ALIAS Is On The Move
As speculated by most when ABC picked up DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES for a full season, ALIAS will move to Wednesdays after LOST making the night a J.J. Abrams night!
ALIAS will kick its fourth season on Wednesday, January 5 with a two-hour premiere from 9 to 11 p.m. The following week, it'll settle into its regular time slot at 9 p.m. following the other J.J. Abrams' show, LOST.
ALIAS season premiere is titled "Authorized Personnel Only" and is rumoured to shake up Sydney Bristow's life.
"Here's to those who wish us well, and those who don't can go to hell."
— Elaine Benes, from SEINFELD
Puss In Boots To Get Own Movie
SHREK 2's kitty will get a direct-to-video movie centered on himself. DreamWorks has tapped Ed Decter and John Strauss to write PUSS IN BOOTS.
The storyline for the movie has not been outlined yet nor was it announced that Antonio Banderas would return to voice the character.
Willis Cries Foul over "Tears"
Bruce Willis, accused of being a "pain in the ass" on the set of Tears of the Sun, says its filmmakers were a pain, too. A pain in the head.
Willis has sued the studio behind the 2003 action-war movie over a combat sequence that the star alleges hurt his forehead and caused "extreme mental, physical and emotional pain and suffering."
The lawsuit, filed Oct. 20 in Los Angeles, was made public Monday by The Smoking Gun. Revolution Studios and Joe Pancake, a crew member identified on IMDb.com as the special-effects foreman of Tears of the Sun, are named as defendants.
Revolution said Monday it could not address the lawsuit. Pancake could not be located for comment.
At issue are the movie-making events of Oct. 21, 2002. In the complaint, Willis says he took "a projectile" to the forehead as he shot a scene simulating a spray of bullets. Willis blames the injury on a negligently placed and detonated squib, a special-effects explosive that substitutes for real, live gunfire.
Willis accuses Revolution and Pancake of negligence and of exposing him and others to "ultrahazardous activity." His lawsuit seeks unspecified damages.
Movie star injuries on set are not uncommon; lawsuits are. Halle Berry (broken arm on Gothika, debris to the eye on Die Another Day) and Nicole Kidman (cracked rib, bum knee on Moulin Rouge) are two banged-up actors who didn't limp off to court. (At least not yet.) Hollywood's most infamous on-the-set accident--the 1982 helicopter mishap on the set of Twilight Zone: The Movie that killed Vic Morrow and two child actors--resulted in the most serious kind of legalese--a manslaughter trial.
Specifics on Willis' injury were not known, outside of the lawsuit noting that the Die Hard icon is still incurring medical expenses. A call to Willis' publicist was not returned Monday.
Tears of the Sun, shot mainly in Hawaii, was released in March 2003. It grossed an underwhelming $43.7 million domestically, and another $42.3 million overseas--the cumulative take still short of the $110 million spent on its producing and marketing, per BoxOfficeMojo.com.
In the film, Willis, "a universally known motion picture star and celebrity," per his lawsuit, played a Navy SEAL officer sent to war-torn Africa to rescue a doctor (Monica Bellucci).
Willis and director Antoine Fuqua clashed during production, with Fuqua telling BBC.com that Willis was the biggest "pain in the ass" he'd ever worked with.
"We just didn't get along," Fuqua said. "We got along off camera, but shooting, we just didn't get along."
Alleged forehead issues aside, the 49-year-old Willis has recovered from the box-office bruising he endured with Tears of the Sun. By IMBb.com's count, he has five films in production or post-production, including Alpha Dog, a true-crime drama costarring Justin Timberlake.
Michael Moore Tops List of Least-Intriguing Stars
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Director Michael Moore, whose anti-Iraq war film "Fahrenheit 9/11" sparked a firestorm of controversy before becoming a post-election footnote, topped an annual list on Monday of Hollywood's "coldest" celebrities.
The outspoken documentarian, who seemed to be everywhere during the 2004 U.S. presidential campaign, urging defeat of President Bush, ranks No. 1 on this year's "Frigid 50" roster of lackluster stars published by online movie magazine FilmThreat.com.
The Web site, known for an anti-establishment take on the entertainment industry, said its list names the stars it found to be the "the polar opposite of the hottest celebrities: these are the least powerful, least-inspiring, least-intriguing people in Hollywood."
Ranked No. 2 was actress Halle Berry, who followed up her Oscar-winning turn in "Monster's Ball" with less critically lauded roles in such films as "Gothica" and "Catwoman."
"The Frigid 50 ice pack have left audiences cold with their overbearing personalities, poor career choices and chronic inability to stop making fools of themselves," the site said.
Moore qualified because of what the editors saw as an oversized ego. "Message to Michael: Remember, it's not always about you. Lose the chip on your shoulder," the editors said.
"Fahrenheit 9/11," hailed by Democrats for its scathing critique of Bush and the U.S.-led war in Iraq but condemned by Republicans as a distorted piece of propaganda, grossed nearly $120 million at the U.S. box office, a record for a political documentary. Moore has said he plans to make a sequel before the next election.
Walt Disney Co. chief executive Michael Eisner was ranked No. 3 on the list, which cited this year's revolt by dissident shareholders, a hostile takeover bid by Comcast, public spats with Pixar and Miramax and a string of such flops as "Home on the Range, "The Alamo" and "Hidalgo."
He was followed at No. 4 by director M. Night Shyamalan whose latest thriller, "The Village" and its "surprise ending" were widely seen as falling far short of the pre-release hype.
Comic actors and frequent co-stars Ben Stiller & Owen Wilson were jointly listed at No. 5 for their appearances in a recent string of "mass-produced mediocrity."
Rounding out the top 10 were: Reese Witherspoon (a "Little Miss Cutesy-Wutesy" whose recent "Vanity Fair" role offered a "disastrous full view of her limitations as an actress"); Jimmy Fallon ("The guy most notorious for blowing his lines on 'Saturday Night Live' crossed over to the big screen in 'Taxi' -- and nobody cared"); Paris Hilton ("She's like a computer virus out of control and she must be stopped") and Ben Affleck ("He's been cursed with the incredible shrinking career").
Ozzy Osbourne in Fight with Intruder
LONDON (Reuters) - Two burglars broke into the English country home of rocker and reality TV star Ozzy Osbourne just before dawn on Monday and stole a large amount of jewelry, police said.
A source close to the family said Osbourne, 55, grabbed one of them, but the intruder struggled free and jumped out of a first-floor window.
Neither Osbourne nor his wife, Sharon, were hurt during the incident, the source said. Their three children together were not in the house at the time. The value of the missing jewelry is still being assessed, the source added.
The burglars used a ladder to climb into the Osbournes' mansion at Chalfont St Peter in Buckinghamshire, north of London, police said, adding that more details would be given at a news conference on Tuesday in nearby Gerrards Cross.
Ozzy Osbourne first shot to fame in the 1970s as frontman of ground-breaking heavy metal band Black Sabbath.
He has since mellowed from wild man of heavy rock to comical much-loved star of MTV's popular reality show "The Osbournes," which offers a peek into his life at home with his family.
Frequently in the news in Britain, he injured himself badly in a quad bike crash a year ago. He fractured eight ribs and a vertebra in the accident and spent several days on a ventilator.
KRAMER ON KRAMER
Michael Richards may be forever re membered as Kramer — the wackiest of the four friends on "Seinfeld" and the originator of countless get-rich-quick schemes — but that doesn't mean he doesn't drive a hard bargain in real life.
There was some very tough negotiating involved before the beloved "show about nothing" could finally come out tomorrow on DVD, where it is expected to be one of the top sellers in the medium's history.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
As of last December, Richards was holding out for more money to film new on-camera appearances and record commentary tracks — as were former castmates Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Elaine) and Jason Alexander (George).
Seinfeld himself and the series' co-creator, Larry David, were already assured the lions' share of DVD residuals.
"At the last minute they came through," Richards told The Post, referring to compensation offered by the DVD's distributor, Columbia/Tri-Star, as well as its producer, Castle Rock Productions.
"We're cutting new ground for residuals on DVD, just as we did [for syndication] when we signed contracts to renew for the series in 1997.
"We knew that if we put up a united front, eventually they would come through with what we wanted," Richards said with a laugh.
He wouldn't give specifics on the deal, but Richards, Louis-Dreyfuss and Alexander reportedly received $13 million apiece for the show's last season.
There's plenty of yada yada — both audio and on-camera commentaries — on the DVDs. The season-three set also includes a documentary devoted to Richards' development of the Kramer character, as well as an interview with Kenny Kramer, the real-life neighbor of Larry David who inspired the TV Kramer.
Recording the commentaries — which fans expected for the DVD release — "was kind of fun, and it was kind of like a reunion," said Richards, who confessed he had never seen most of the episodes before.
Richards was recruited for the show by David, with whom he had worked on a late-night series called "Fridays," over the initial objections of Seinfeld. Jerry wanted another actor to play Kramer, who was called Kessler in the pilot because of legal concerns.
During the series' nine seasons, Richards always wore the same pair of shoes — which were constantly resoled — and demolished three copies of the door to Jerry's apartment during his energetic trademark entrances.
Perhaps the most serious actor of the four leads, Richards admits he sometimes lost his cool after his co-stars blew their lines, which was often — but in a large selection of bloopers, Richards is never, ever seen breaking character.
By the end of the show's fourth season, Seinfeld-mania had reached such heights in the U.S. that Richards decided to get away from it all and took a trip to Bali.
"But even when I went deep into the tropical jungle, they were calling me 'Kramer, Kramer.' " he says with a laugh.